A Slap In The Face

Evidently, it doesn't seem to matter to drug and alcohol counselors that Alcoholics Anonymous virtually ignores the facts about women and alcoholism.  Women don't drink like men do. For one thing, women have a lower percentage of water in their bodies, which means a woman who drinks the same amount as a man will have a higher blood alcohol content.  THIS is fact. Alcohol related problems for women, however, are dealt with the guidelines developed for men. Why? Because of Alcoholics Anonymous.  A program developed for men.  A program that uses a book written in 1935, no less.  That book, The Big Book, is even used in treatment centers for women.  Even though, the book was obviously written for men.  There's even a chapter titled, "To Wives."  Not to mention, since most female alcoholics also have past histories of childhood or sexual traumas, it makes even LESS sense to subject them to such an inconsiderate, sexist program such as AA.



On another note, Alcoholics Anonymous is also a "spiritual" program.  Even though alcoholism is a known and recognized medical disease, the best known cure doctors and therapists still recommend is AA? Even if you're not put off by spirituality, you might be put off by the fact that AA doesn't use vague terms.  AA uses "God," and a male God at that.  For many women who have a history of rape, perhaps the idea of an all-powerful male diety coming to the rescue might not be very helpful.  In fact, it could have the opposite effect.  Consider the 12 Steps themselves:  Step 3 is, "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."

Psychologically, Alcoholics Anonymous re-traumatizes women.  It creates an atomosphere of women being treated as secondary.  This lowers a women's self-esteem.  Alcoholics are supposed to rebuild their self-esteem.  Instead, AA tells a woman she has a problem, and then goes and slaps her in the face for having one.  What I have to wonder is, how many women tried AA, found it insulting and nauseating, and started to drink again only to die from alcoholism?  So, Alcoholics Anonymous, what's YOUR problem?  Are you there to save lives or to stubbornly refuse to CHANGE your ineffective program because you're scared to help more people?

Don't make me use my stuff on ya, baby!

This post is titled with a quote from Elvis, as portrayed by Bruce Campbell in Bubba Ho-Tep, the 2002 movie directed by Don Coscarelli. Recently, I was invited over to the wooded wonderland of Bainbridge, Ohio.  Gladly, I wasn't alone in this wilderness, as I had myself a tour guide, Lex Watttz. What does the movie have to do with Elvis? Can't tell you that, you'll have to watch it! What I'm writing about is opening up your eyes, waking up, and becoming alive and aware of life's possibilities.

A year ago, I lost everything.  In March, 2011, I went through a miserable break up of a 7 year relationship.  This would be enough of a struggle if we didn't have a daughter together, and if I wasn't in the midst of a severe drinking problem.  My ex came from a large family, which meant I lost several "sisters and brothers," "nieces and nephews,"  and "family friends," totaling near 75 people.  No joke.  I lost an entire army of people I had considered supporters and allies.  But I digress, because we all know extreme loss causes bitterness, grief, stress and pain.  Which brings me back to Lex.

In early fall of last year, I hid in the background of life collecting friends on facebook rather than facing the world head on.  Somehow, I was friended by a guy who didn't mind chatting with me online while I played Deal or No Deal.  He even picked out the briefcases.  Lex wanted to meet me, but I was afraid to meet someone from the Internet.  I agreed the second time, and we went to a bookstore together and had coffee.  We stopped for a drink at the Spitfire, a real cool punk bar, and I was nervous as hell.  First, I was trying hard not to be the "drunk girl."  Secondly, because I found him attractive and I was sweating bullets.  Then, he kissed me.

Since then, I went through 2 months of intensive alcohol rehab.  I vanished from the world to get better.  I have stayed sober.  And to my surprise, Lex stuck by me.  He honored me by calling himself my boyfriend through all the hardship.  And recently, during a hockey game, he got down on one knee and proposed to me. I know this blog is supposed to be reserved for musicians and artists, but since I haven't posted since October I owed to myself to start fresh.  Lex, if you're reading this, you've given me a new reason to believe, to hope, to dream, and to create.  Our future lies ahead, bright and beautiful.  I'm thinking of renaming this blog.  LOL.  Stay tuned for more...

Rocktober with Josh Davis

 If life hands you lemons, Josh Davis would "sit there for an hour rubbing them into my wounds before I realized what I was doing.  Then I would probably make lemon meringue pie or something."  The point this Ohio bred musician is making is life is what you make of it, and Josh Davis is making a life for himself with his music career.

Meet Josh Davis, aficionado of the drums, keys, bass and vocals. A multi-talented artist, he is originally from North Lewisburg, Ohio, but is currently based in the Fairborn/Dayton area of Ohio in a town named Xenia.  Previously, for two years, he was the lead guitarist and vocalist for the band Voice of Vengeance, who once opened for Obituary. 

Whereas Voice of Vengeance was a "hybrid of modern and old-school death metal," Josh is interested in a wide variety of music.  "Anything from grunge to death metal to contemporary rock to industrial.  I have recently developed a taste for jazz and pop, which I wouldn't have been caught dead listening to as a teenager."  Davis also mentions dubstep and electronic music as becoming a bigger influence lately on his main style, which continues to be metal.  As his Facebook musician page info reads:

I work in a few different genres so take your pick, skip what u don't like.

To check out more Josh Davis' metal side, reminiscent of death metal such as God Dethroned,  try out his Black Zombie Factory on myspace.com. I also highly recommend the Damn Building page, to check out the melodic Mudvayne-style song "Self Unified."  Fans of anything from Clutch to Seether to Soundgarden will appreciate a track that Josh Davis obviously put his heart and soul into the tracks on this site.

Hints of the acoustic rock his musical roots are based in are found in the harmony and layered lyrical precision of "Self Unified."  Davis collaborated with his dad, who wrote the verses, and while the lyrics were never intended to be a song, the heartfelt words spurred the idea of adding music.  Also check out "What About Tomorrow," a song Davis admits was written in a difficult part of his life.  "And of course it involved a girl," he adds for emphasis.

Social media has helped connect many artists, including Josh, to others in ways previous generations couldn't imagine.  Here's hoping more fans are produced as a result of clicking on these links! And be sure to check out his Facebook page and like it!  Remember, life is what you make of it.

The Ballad of Ricky Vaughn

After the MTV Music Awards I realized two things: One, that the rebellious ‘no host’ concept of the show did not disguise the fact that the annual drool fest gets classier than the Grammy’s every year. Secondly, like MTV, I have only known Cleveland for 30 years. It was about time I started a blog, one for those also involved in creative ventures, and one for those who want more exposure in the Cleveland area.

With almost thirty years on this planet, I also have come to terms with the fact that I used to be far too judgmental. For instance, punks can’t play tennis, only nerds make youtube videos, sluts don’t go to church, and Satanists make the best strudel, naturally. Girls, boys, was I ever so wrong! Turns out punks make the best strudel, nerds play tennis, sluts make the best youtube videos, and Satanists have their own churches!!! Cleveland has also been no stranger to having assumptions thrown its way.

Remember how Charlie Sheen starred in “Major League”? Of course, you do. Admittedly, he filmed the masterpiece under the influence of steroids to help him achieve a “winning” performance. “You can print this, I don’t give a f—. My fastball went from 79 to like 85,” doth quoted Sheen. You have to admire Sheen’s commitment to character, it's like if Julia Roberts admitted to dappling in prostitution for her role in Pretty Woman or if a young clownfish swam over the drop-off prior the actual animating of “Finding Nemo.” Similarly, I am committed to Cleveland, the west side and the east side. Surrounding areas- got it. Outlying areas- got that too. Low-lying, islanders, out-of-staters, foreigners, and anyone with love for Cleveland are the best kind of people I know.

In “Major League,” however, Cleveland took its share of hits.

Jake Taylor: I play for the Indians.

Chaire Holloway: Here in Cleveland? I didn't know they still had a team!

Jake Taylor: Yup, we've got uniforms and everything, it's really great!

And so what, “Major League” was filmed in Milwaukee. We here in Northeast Ohio know that’s like pouring Maxwell House into a Starbucks cup. Sister, please! Besides, Charlie Sheen stole his “winning” quotation from an episode of “8 Simple Rules.” Prove it, you say. I shall: In this episode, the father Paul Hennessy’s teenage daughter Bridget scores her first job where she receives a 40% discount on clothing. “I always win,” Bridget says. “I’m a winner.” In the end, she overspends the allocated funds for fashion and gets no paycheck. Obviously, this storyline hit home with Charlie Sheen the way Ricky Vaughn’s character got under his skin. (Wait, that was the steroids.) If you don’t like sarcasm, don’t come to Cleveland, we were winning back when there only “4 Simple Rules.” (All of which we broke because we are trailblazers, not sheep blindly following the herd.) But here’s one rule, don’t talk about the Burning River, unless you are referring to the eponymously titled Great Lakes Brewing Company beer.

Even though an episode of “30 Rock” took part of the cast to Cleveland, it was with a grain of sarcastic salt. But it did garner Cleveland attention, and like an unhealthy romance, negative attention is sometimes better than no attention at all. Yet, I digress. My blog is about positive attention for Cleveland, its residents, and its creative core. This blog will interview artists, musicians, and others who are inspiring the next generation of Clevelanders, Lakewood-ians, Westlakers, Parma-nites, Brooklyn-ders, and Strongsvillians. And that’s only to name a few.

Harry Doyle: That's all we got, one goddamn hit?

Assistant: You can't say goddamn on the air.

Harry Doyle: Don't worry, nobody is listening anyway.

Correction, I have been listening. And it’s ironic how Sheen’s quotes of late are so befitting of “Things Cleveland Would Say if Cleveland Could Talk.” Such as, “Duh, winning!” Cleveland is totally like, duh, winning! Cleveland is not as easily digested as a Fig Newton or a rice cake. No. Like Sheen, Cleveland would say, “If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ “It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm.” You’d see the art galleries, the cafes, and the hot night spots and wonder why you keep booking weekends to NYC or Vegas. Staycations? Oh, yes. Some people just don’t understand the draw.

Cleveland would take the cigarette out Charlie Sheen’s mouth, stomp on it, and make a flower grow out of its ashes. Cleveland has higher self-esteem than the warlock himself, and accordingly Cleveland also says “I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.” You think you have a magic marker, Cleveland has a magic mark of pride… It is a leader, not a follower. In Sheen-speak, Cleveland proclaims, “I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA.”

If you got what it takes to impress me, e-mail me at jhek81@gmail.com or hit me up at facebook at http://facebook.com/juliet.abram.  I'm looking for anyone who wants to be promoted in the Cleveland area, with a background in creative arts, music, and entertainment.  Consideration will be made for other worthy endeavors, such as those who grow their own food, make their own clothes, or know of a really sweet store or company looking for free advertisement!  Remember, as Charlie Sheen said, “Can’t is the cancer of happen.” Let’s make this happen!

“If you’re a part of my family, I will love you violently.” – Charlie Sheen